You're always welcome here. I thought I made that clear already, but apparently not. Truthfully — my home feels empty without you in it.
[ he hadn't altogether planned on asking her to move in, and he's still not sure that's what this is now. but what he does know is that he'll worry every minute that she's not close. her home has none of the security that his does, although he doesn't point out this very practical fact. ]
I never get tired of looking at me, either. Maybe you'll get tired of looking at me looking at me. But regardless, I'll have a key made for you today.
[ there's much he hasn't considered until this moment — how alina will know how much time he spends not sleeping, or how frequently he skips his medication, or how much wine he and zoya manage to demolish during their nights of commiseration. none of that paints him in a particularly attractive light, and he's more worried that alina's opinion of him might change for the worse rather than this happening too soon. but — ]
Do you feel like it's too soon? [ dominik never fully moved in, at least not entirely by choice than out of necessity. he has no idea at what point alina felt comfortable moving in with aleksander, if at all. it's certainly possible they're making a mistake, but he doesn't think they are. ] Just stay with me a bit. If you like the feeling, then we'll move all your things in. If you don't, I promise that I'll still be just as happy to take over your bed at your place instead.
I don't like how you're always the reasonable one.
[ equipped with his practical mind, searching for solutions to any challenge he stumbles across. that, too, is a white lie from her mouth — hollow, nothing of substance at its center, if he were to investigate it. for as chaotic as the tangle of nikolai's thoughts can be, chasing after the ambitions and adventures that gleam in his peripheral, he's been a consistent, steadying presence. an anchor, when she begins to drift off and into herself.
but even as she loosens a laugh on her next breath, she recognizes nikolai's habit of sprinkling his insecurities like kernels for her to collect, hidden amongst the charm and easy wit. here and now, it's those crumbs of insisting she might tire of him, an uncanny reflection of her own fears. ]
Luckily for me, I have ways of making you look at me instead of whatever shiny surfaces you find. [ idly, she taps her fingers against the sheets, warring with her own tongue before she admits, ] I don't know if it's too soon, but I think ... it helps in showing us this isn't temporary. That you've made room for me in your life, and I've made room for you in mine. Having a physical reminder of that couldn't hurt, could it?
[ it could be a disaster, but — it could be good for them, a leap of progress she hadn't considered, if their testing phase goes smoothly. releasing her anxiety to the wind, she grasps for a deep, stabilizing breath. ]
So I'll agree to your experiment, but I have conditions. [ as though she hadn't been worried, two minutes earlier, of infringing and forcing her way into his life. though unseen, the smile seeps into her voice, a soft and basking warmth. ] You'll let me paint your walls, and you'll come to bed when I ask. I get cold without you there.
I don't remember the last time anyone called me reasonable. I must be losing my edge.
[ but he says it around a laugh, looking at his ruined shelf in amusement. the thought of waking up to alina every morning has him feeling excited again, a cautious acceptance that he hasn't bungled this beyond repair. instead they've somehow made even greater steps toward each other, defying his nagging expectation of disaster.
he's happy to make room for alina, and knows now that he should be open in showing it. rising from the couch, he wanders from room to room, imagining the ways in which they could change. he's always had a surplus of space, and many of the rooms go untouched for months at a time. zoya has claimed one of the downstairs bedrooms as her own for whenever she decides she needs a quiet place to be sour, and nikolai uses his expansive, wood-paneled study more than any other space in the house, his bedroom upstairs often going unused. ]
I'm afraid I don't have anything like your sunroom. I could possibly knock out some ceiling space and convert something into one, though. [ he pulls at the blinds in the kitchen window, letting the sun stream in. ] As for your conditions, the painting sounds more than agreeable, but how many requests for "five more minutes" am I allotted before coming to bed? I need at least three.
[ she can nearly hear him begin to draft the mental blueprints in his mind. three steps ahead of her, seized by a sudden burst of energy that's simultaneously charming to watch and exhausting to imagine for herself — the permanent turning of gears, a jumble of thoughts that refuse to neatly sort themselves. but maybe, if they had direction, an outlet to pour themselves for now —
redecorating his home isn't the worst invention he could preoccupy his time with, less worrisome and plaguing than toppling aleksander's slowly crumbling enterprise. an amused hum bubbles in her throat, spilling over. ]
You're just eager for a new project, puppy. [ no, not just. that excitement does remind her of droopy ears and a wagging tail, though — despite all of her poor manners — she knows better than to make the comparison aloud. ] You don't need to build me a sunroom or studio to make me want to stay.
[ — in case that's what this is. it's overwhelming, regardless — unfamiliar, to have someone so keen to offer her their home as her own. ]
We can negotiate. [ her nose scrunches, unoffended. it would sting, if they hadn't already soothed their hands over that wound. ] Two and a half times, and then I'm free to start dragging you to bed myself.
no subject
[ he hadn't altogether planned on asking her to move in, and he's still not sure that's what this is now. but what he does know is that he'll worry every minute that she's not close. her home has none of the security that his does, although he doesn't point out this very practical fact. ]
I never get tired of looking at me, either. Maybe you'll get tired of looking at me looking at me. But regardless, I'll have a key made for you today.
[ there's much he hasn't considered until this moment — how alina will know how much time he spends not sleeping, or how frequently he skips his medication, or how much wine he and zoya manage to demolish during their nights of commiseration. none of that paints him in a particularly attractive light, and he's more worried that alina's opinion of him might change for the worse rather than this happening too soon. but — ]
Do you feel like it's too soon? [ dominik never fully moved in, at least not entirely by choice than out of necessity. he has no idea at what point alina felt comfortable moving in with aleksander, if at all. it's certainly possible they're making a mistake, but he doesn't think they are. ] Just stay with me a bit. If you like the feeling, then we'll move all your things in. If you don't, I promise that I'll still be just as happy to take over your bed at your place instead.
no subject
[ equipped with his practical mind, searching for solutions to any challenge he stumbles across. that, too, is a white lie from her mouth — hollow, nothing of substance at its center, if he were to investigate it. for as chaotic as the tangle of nikolai's thoughts can be, chasing after the ambitions and adventures that gleam in his peripheral, he's been a consistent, steadying presence. an anchor, when she begins to drift off and into herself.
but even as she loosens a laugh on her next breath, she recognizes nikolai's habit of sprinkling his insecurities like kernels for her to collect, hidden amongst the charm and easy wit. here and now, it's those crumbs of insisting she might tire of him, an uncanny reflection of her own fears. ]
Luckily for me, I have ways of making you look at me instead of whatever shiny surfaces you find. [ idly, she taps her fingers against the sheets, warring with her own tongue before she admits, ] I don't know if it's too soon, but I think ... it helps in showing us this isn't temporary. That you've made room for me in your life, and I've made room for you in mine. Having a physical reminder of that couldn't hurt, could it?
[ it could be a disaster, but — it could be good for them, a leap of progress she hadn't considered, if their testing phase goes smoothly. releasing her anxiety to the wind, she grasps for a deep, stabilizing breath. ]
So I'll agree to your experiment, but I have conditions. [ as though she hadn't been worried, two minutes earlier, of infringing and forcing her way into his life. though unseen, the smile seeps into her voice, a soft and basking warmth. ] You'll let me paint your walls, and you'll come to bed when I ask. I get cold without you there.
no subject
[ but he says it around a laugh, looking at his ruined shelf in amusement. the thought of waking up to alina every morning has him feeling excited again, a cautious acceptance that he hasn't bungled this beyond repair. instead they've somehow made even greater steps toward each other, defying his nagging expectation of disaster.
he's happy to make room for alina, and knows now that he should be open in showing it. rising from the couch, he wanders from room to room, imagining the ways in which they could change. he's always had a surplus of space, and many of the rooms go untouched for months at a time. zoya has claimed one of the downstairs bedrooms as her own for whenever she decides she needs a quiet place to be sour, and nikolai uses his expansive, wood-paneled study more than any other space in the house, his bedroom upstairs often going unused. ]
I'm afraid I don't have anything like your sunroom. I could possibly knock out some ceiling space and convert something into one, though. [ he pulls at the blinds in the kitchen window, letting the sun stream in. ] As for your conditions, the painting sounds more than agreeable, but how many requests for "five more minutes" am I allotted before coming to bed? I need at least three.
no subject
redecorating his home isn't the worst invention he could preoccupy his time with, less worrisome and plaguing than toppling aleksander's slowly crumbling enterprise. an amused hum bubbles in her throat, spilling over. ]
You're just eager for a new project, puppy. [ no, not just. that excitement does remind her of droopy ears and a wagging tail, though — despite all of her poor manners — she knows better than to make the comparison aloud. ] You don't need to build me a sunroom or studio to make me want to stay.
[ — in case that's what this is. it's overwhelming, regardless — unfamiliar, to have someone so keen to offer her their home as her own. ]
We can negotiate. [ her nose scrunches, unoffended. it would sting, if they hadn't already soothed their hands over that wound. ] Two and a half times, and then I'm free to start dragging you to bed myself.